Life Long Friend

Dean says he only wants one kid, when and if we decide to try again. I don't know how many... if any ...or what I will think later, but one sounds okay.

For years I have been asking parents of only children, what they thought of having one child. The common response is that they should have had two instead of just one. One reason was so that they can play and learn from each other, the other reason (this is what bothered me the most) is that when they are gone, the child will not have anybody.

Both are great reasons and I totally understand where they are coming from because I am lucky... when I am 90 and my parents have finally died I will still have a 92 year old brother and an 88 year old "baby" sister. So I get it.

The only thing I can think of to do whether Dean and I have one or five kids is to raise them to know and love the Lord Jesus Christ because he is the only one who will be there for them from day one to day done.

There have been so many times in my life when nobody, not my brother, my sister, my mom or dad have been able to relate or understand the things I have been through and the only reason I did not turn to drugs or alcohol is because I had my Savior to turn too.

If Dean and I decide to start a family, we will see where that leads.......... if Dean and I have twins, then we are in a heap of trouble......... if Dean and I have only one child we will do our best to educate our child on the life long friend they have in Jesus so they are never ever alone.

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My husband loves me...and I he...

I try very hard not to be materialistic, but sometimes "things" can really add to happiness. 

Dean is the bread winner in our family and he works very hard for us. As a photographer, I don't bring in the big bucks not to mention it's a part-time seasonal job. He allows me to do what I love for work and play.

I was honestly fine with my 1985 two stroke Honda, but Dean wanted me to ride something nicer, so he got me a 2009 four stroke Honda.

Sometimes I don't feel like I deserve all that he gives me, but I chose wisely and carefully and I did not settle for anybody who didn't let me be me. He has his faults and so do I, but there is nobody else for me in this world and let me tell you, I spent a lot of time looking... which gives me perspective on how precious Dean is.

I had faith I would find him and just when I wanted to give up, the Lord provided me with more happiness than I would have ever imagined.

I thank the Lord for my husband and the unconditional love he provides for me.... oh ya and my sweet ass dirt bike:)

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No more Pain

Turns out gluten is the cause of my severe unexplainable pain... My dad has been telling me for a while that I may have a sensitivity to gluten because he does, but I didn't want to believe it.

Guess what... I have a serious problem digesting gluten... When I don't have gluten, I don't have pain. The good news is that now I know and with some discipline I can be pain free, the bad news is that I can't have me some biscuits and gravy or grilled cheese on white bread or ...and this is the worst... tortillas:(

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I caught myself....

talking to a fly today.

This morning, I noticed a huge fly kept ramming itself into the mirror in the bathroom. I said out loud to the fly,

"It's okay, I see how you  would keep doing that, because it looks like there's another room in there, doesn't it? I get it."

It was then that I realized I really miss Dean...

I need someone to talk too around the house. I don't want anymore one sided conversations with flies.

Everyone Woman Should....

Last year, I did vanity pictures for an awesome gal I really think is great. She told me it was liberating and fun and every woman should have some taken, so I took her advice. I had her and my sister come over and take some photos of me for Dean's 3 year wedding anniversary gift. 

A part of me didn't want to do them because I didn't look the way I wanted or I felt like I was too big to do something like this, but I shook all my insecurities with the help of Crown Royal and Red Bull, Crown Royal and soda, Crown Royal and diet soda, some Mike's Hard Lemon Aid.... and we went for it...

I had so much fun and if you're reading this and want your own pics done... call me, it just so happens I'm a photographer:)

My relationship with...

my grill.

Before I met Dean, I grilled like I had no stove or oven. I grilled like it was the only way of life, I grilled like... okay you get it, I grilled a lot.

When I met Dean, he sort of took over the grill (like most men I dated). I missed that old thing as Dean spent more and more time with it than I did. It was like a love that was forbidden, it was like a love that must never be, it was like.... okay you get it, I missed the grill.

Anyway... Dean is outta town and I am back to my old ways.... Lovin it!







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Did you see it?

Yesterday was Father's Day and I spent time with my dad, brother and brother-in-law. They are all fathers and I could see just a glimmer of proud in their eyes. Men are awesome, they are so different than woman in so many ways.

Over the years I have noticed that some woman (not all) expect certain things on Mother's Day and often complain about how they wished they could have done this or that, but men are different. It seems men don't expect much so they are thankful for less. I didn't hear one complaint about how the day ended up or how they wanted this or that to happen.

On my way home from my dad's house I saw Father's Day BBQ events, people gathered together to celebrate their dads; as I rubber necked several of these events I could tell which men were dads because they just had that happy look on their face.

I am not sure if anybody noticed the look, but next year, if you remember, look at your dad or other dads on father's day and you will see it, the look of joy and happiness that they are dads. I saw it, did you?